My Friend the Internerd
I rely on the internet more than any other source for baby information: more than my doctor, other moms I know, and strangers on the street (often to their chagrin). It's not because I don't think any of these sources have potentially helpful information. I know everyone who has raised or provided care for a child has lots of experience doing what worked for them. I'm just one of those people who likes to investigate all my options before committing to anything. Drives my husband nuts.
Me: “I saw garbage bins on sale at National Steering Wheel today.”
Husband: “Oh yeah? Did you grab a few? We need some for the garage.”
Me: “No. I wasn't sure. I mean, House Tools and even Door Store had some in their flyers this week that looked pretty good. I think I'll check them out tomorrow.”
Husband: “Are you kidding me? They're garbage bins! Buy the stupid things at National Steering Wheel and be done with it. You're insane.”
Me: “Well, let me think on it.”
Husband shakes head.
I digress.
I wouldn't say, though, that it's easy to use the internet to garner the goods on babies. There is no end to websites that tell you how to best raise your baby. At first it's akin to walking through a mall on December 23rd and having every person you pass stop and offer their insight on what your baby needs. But the lovely thing about it is it's much easier to ignore or tell a website it's ridiculous than it is to do so to a real live person. If (after reading up on his approach) I don't agree with what Dr. Ignoreacryingbaby - the famous pediatrician - says I can just keep surfing onto the next site without batting an eye. No justification for doing so required. No getting all flustered and thinking of a million razor-sharp comments after he's graced me with his advice and moved on.
The other, related, thing the internet affords is a macro view of approaches to baby care. One website says all babies have the potential to sleep through the night from three weeks old if they are given pablum in a bottle before bed. Another site says never give a baby pablum before bed but try offering it at lunch as of two months and baby will learn to fill up during the day and sleep better at night. A different site says as soon as a baby starts watching you eat and tries grabbing your food to put in their mouths, the baby is ready for solid food. The main benefit here is that the baby will be more satisfied and go for longer stretches of sleep at night.
For me all three of these approaches fall into the same category that I do not support: feed babies foods their bodies are not ready for if it will give tired parents more sleep. I would have had to talk to a lot of different people and read a lot of books (not that I'm against books, but my time is limited) just to understand that these three statements are all annoying cousins part of the same no-good family of approaches to babies' sleep. The ability to scan many websites in a fraction of the time it would take me to have all those discussions and read all those books is extremely valuable to me.
Of course, I must say that I do not think there is anything wrong with how pre-internet moms learned what they know. They made use of the resources available to them (their moms, friends, etc.) and we all turned out just fine. Same goes for moms who don't view the internet as a mothering resource with the same affection I do. I just happen to like this way of learning because it works for me. I like being well-informed on this stuff. I like doing the research.
Maybe this is where my university education finally comes into play. I learned nothing subject matter-wise in university that I use in the workplace. What I did learn there, though, is how to do research properly and how to think critically. Apart from having, perhaps, a Masters in Baby Soothing Studies and a Ph.D. in Patience, I cannot think of two more important qualifications for a mother to have.
Me: “I saw garbage bins on sale at National Steering Wheel today.”
Husband: “Oh yeah? Did you grab a few? We need some for the garage.”
Me: “No. I wasn't sure. I mean, House Tools and even Door Store had some in their flyers this week that looked pretty good. I think I'll check them out tomorrow.”
Husband: “Are you kidding me? They're garbage bins! Buy the stupid things at National Steering Wheel and be done with it. You're insane.”
Me: “Well, let me think on it.”
Husband shakes head.
I digress.
I wouldn't say, though, that it's easy to use the internet to garner the goods on babies. There is no end to websites that tell you how to best raise your baby. At first it's akin to walking through a mall on December 23rd and having every person you pass stop and offer their insight on what your baby needs. But the lovely thing about it is it's much easier to ignore or tell a website it's ridiculous than it is to do so to a real live person. If (after reading up on his approach) I don't agree with what Dr. Ignoreacryingbaby - the famous pediatrician - says I can just keep surfing onto the next site without batting an eye. No justification for doing so required. No getting all flustered and thinking of a million razor-sharp comments after he's graced me with his advice and moved on.
The other, related, thing the internet affords is a macro view of approaches to baby care. One website says all babies have the potential to sleep through the night from three weeks old if they are given pablum in a bottle before bed. Another site says never give a baby pablum before bed but try offering it at lunch as of two months and baby will learn to fill up during the day and sleep better at night. A different site says as soon as a baby starts watching you eat and tries grabbing your food to put in their mouths, the baby is ready for solid food. The main benefit here is that the baby will be more satisfied and go for longer stretches of sleep at night.
For me all three of these approaches fall into the same category that I do not support: feed babies foods their bodies are not ready for if it will give tired parents more sleep. I would have had to talk to a lot of different people and read a lot of books (not that I'm against books, but my time is limited) just to understand that these three statements are all annoying cousins part of the same no-good family of approaches to babies' sleep. The ability to scan many websites in a fraction of the time it would take me to have all those discussions and read all those books is extremely valuable to me.
Of course, I must say that I do not think there is anything wrong with how pre-internet moms learned what they know. They made use of the resources available to them (their moms, friends, etc.) and we all turned out just fine. Same goes for moms who don't view the internet as a mothering resource with the same affection I do. I just happen to like this way of learning because it works for me. I like being well-informed on this stuff. I like doing the research.
Maybe this is where my university education finally comes into play. I learned nothing subject matter-wise in university that I use in the workplace. What I did learn there, though, is how to do research properly and how to think critically. Apart from having, perhaps, a Masters in Baby Soothing Studies and a Ph.D. in Patience, I cannot think of two more important qualifications for a mother to have.
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