To Change or Not to Change
When I was pregnant I had a lot of people tell me everything about my life as I knew it was going to change. Sometimes this was said with a smug undertone to the tune of, "Oh those suckers are really in for it, they have no idea."
Well as I've said before, I fully realized I had no idea what it would be like to be a parent, and did not for a moment pretend otherwise. I probably sound like a broken record to anyone (is there anyone?) who has read my other posts. Please bear with me - I am going somewhere new here.
So to no surprise, things have actually changed with a wee one around. Pretty much everything to be exact. So there you go smuggies. You were right. Even though I never said you were wrong.
Okay so here's the new twist, and the reason why I rehashed the little bit of info above. After being bombarded by comments of the sort I've just described for nine months, the comments, I've noticed, seem to have undergone an about-face. What do I hear now?
"You know, you really can't let the baby run your life."
Hrm.
Of course when considering the weight to be given to a statement one must consider the source. Usually these kinds of statements come from one of two types of people:
1. People who have not had children; or,
2. People who have donned the rose-coloured glasses that must be given out at the great big "Congrats it's been a decade since you had a baby around!" party I'm sure someone, somewhere throws.
Everything I do in a day is impacted by my daughter's existence (for example, "If I take the time to change the toilet paper roll right now, what piece of furniture's leg will bear the imprint of two half-teeth as a result of my absence?").
I don't consider it letting her run my life. I see it more as taking full responsibility for a choice I made a year and a half ago. I see it more as embracing the notion that the introduction of a baby to one's life should cause everything to change. Babies really are that needy - and not because they all seek to be spoiled rotten or anything ridiculous like that. I cannot understand how anyone can think a baby would require anything less than a complete realignment of priorities and redefinition of "our life".
Now I don't plan on being the parent who shoves her child into every sport and social club going so that I become nothing more than an executive assistant to her. There will definitely come a time when there will be a balance between my daughter's wants and those of my husband and me. However, for now, what some outsiders may consider my daughter's wants (i.e. be in bed by 8:00 p.m., two naps a day, eat every three hours, etc.) are actually her needs. I will rearrange my social life as much as necessary to meet these needs because I chose to become a parent and sometimes parents just need to act like grown-ups. Sometimes.
Well as I've said before, I fully realized I had no idea what it would be like to be a parent, and did not for a moment pretend otherwise. I probably sound like a broken record to anyone (is there anyone?) who has read my other posts. Please bear with me - I am going somewhere new here.
So to no surprise, things have actually changed with a wee one around. Pretty much everything to be exact. So there you go smuggies. You were right. Even though I never said you were wrong.
Okay so here's the new twist, and the reason why I rehashed the little bit of info above. After being bombarded by comments of the sort I've just described for nine months, the comments, I've noticed, seem to have undergone an about-face. What do I hear now?
"You know, you really can't let the baby run your life."
Hrm.
Of course when considering the weight to be given to a statement one must consider the source. Usually these kinds of statements come from one of two types of people:
1. People who have not had children; or,
2. People who have donned the rose-coloured glasses that must be given out at the great big "Congrats it's been a decade since you had a baby around!" party I'm sure someone, somewhere throws.
Everything I do in a day is impacted by my daughter's existence (for example, "If I take the time to change the toilet paper roll right now, what piece of furniture's leg will bear the imprint of two half-teeth as a result of my absence?").
I don't consider it letting her run my life. I see it more as taking full responsibility for a choice I made a year and a half ago. I see it more as embracing the notion that the introduction of a baby to one's life should cause everything to change. Babies really are that needy - and not because they all seek to be spoiled rotten or anything ridiculous like that. I cannot understand how anyone can think a baby would require anything less than a complete realignment of priorities and redefinition of "our life".
Now I don't plan on being the parent who shoves her child into every sport and social club going so that I become nothing more than an executive assistant to her. There will definitely come a time when there will be a balance between my daughter's wants and those of my husband and me. However, for now, what some outsiders may consider my daughter's wants (i.e. be in bed by 8:00 p.m., two naps a day, eat every three hours, etc.) are actually her needs. I will rearrange my social life as much as necessary to meet these needs because I chose to become a parent and sometimes parents just need to act like grown-ups. Sometimes.
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